23rd of March 2020

Had enough yesterday. Walked out half way through my shift because one of the dopier riders came in with a cough. All my concerns had been totally ignored, so I said I’m not risking lives for this and left. Unfortunately, I forgot to put the scooter key back in the shop when I finished, so I’ll have to go back at some point. And you know what, they’re still carrying on as normal!

It was a beautiful day so there were a lot of people, mostly smug white people, out. I wondered about why this was, that they thought they were impervious to harm, or somehow exempt from the responsibility of potentially harming others. I think they maybe have never experienced adversity so can’t comprehend it. Bad things happen on the other side of the world, or to poor people, who maybe, just maybe deserve it a little? Because if they’re not culpable for their misfortune maybe their own privilege isn’t deserved either? I don’t know. Anyway, they were meeting up for coffees, buying flowers from markets, hanging out enjoying the sun in parks as normal.  But everywhere I went I heard coughing.

I couldn’t help thinking if they could see past the ends of their noses, they might notice all the ambulances (I counted 11 in four hours), screaming around with drivers who don’t even have face masks. About a week ago I saw an ambulance pick someone up just behind city road. All the crew were wearing white overalls and masks. Now they’re wearing just the usual green uniforms with no protective gear. And apparently doctors are getting mugged as they leave hospitals at the end of their shifts and Tesco delivery drivers are getting their vans nicked. I wouldn’t normally advocate this at all, but I think the police need to start nicking people, because it must be verging on criminal behaviour, culpable homicide? Manslaughter? I wondered if I was doing the same thing.

A bigger concern for me now is the crime. It doesn’t feel safe out there. I saw at least three times the amount of police vehicles as ambulances. Over 30 in four hours, squads of bikes whizzing past, vans, cars. I dropped a few pizzas in some blocks of flats, which is normally fine, but they had a real air of dystopia yesterday.

I started using the bike key to press the buttons on the intercoms, but it felt like a futile gesture. Especially since the shop was still taking cash orders even though I asked repeatedly for them to stop. One bloke off Caledonian road paid with a £20 note and a handful of grubby change. I’ve started holding the bag open for people to take the pizza out themselves, I know my gloves probably have the virus on them and I don’t want to spread it, but I partly can’t be arsed to do different. I’m not paid enough. One woman took the pizza out like I was a leper, reaching for it while keeping as far away as possible.

The staff were getting mutinous. Soon as I arrived all the chat was about the number of infections in the area around us which was alarmingly high. And we know they’re not testing. The shift manager’s wife is pregnant so he said after tomorrow he wasn’t coming in. Same with one of the other riders, young guy, but still doesn’t want to risk it. They say if enough of us don’t come in they’ll have to shut the shop. I was beginning to agree. If there’s one time to withdraw your labour, it’s now. I wasn’t quite ready for a wildcat strike, but I was lobbying for the shop to shut. Then this guy got to work…

I like this guy, but for fucks sake, if you have a potentially life threatening, highly contagious disease, don’t come to work! Especially if your job is literally going door to door all over the city. I reckon between us we’ve potentially infected thousands. He said it was just a cough, no fever, so he got a mask designed to filter pollution and came to work anyway. Thing is, it’ll be on his hands, his clothes, and he will have been infectious for a week before he had symptoms. Comes back to the same thing though, we’re not covered by this sick pay thing from the people’s hero ex hedge fund manager Rishi Sunak, so we’re going to keep working. It fucks me off a lot, it seems like all he’s done is protect the income of people who are already doing alright and all the very clever sensibles are acting like he's Che Guevara or something. The rest of us can do one. 

The manager sent him off to the hospital, I thought that was dumb because if he didn’t have it, he does now. Predictably they didn’t test him, just sent him home. He’s still insisting it’s nothing.

When I went the boss was asking if I could work tomorrow. I said no, they need to shut the shop and give it a deep clean (they haven’t). Then he asked if I could work in another store. Nah. I said we need sick pay, but that was ignored.

I messaged the group when I read Nando's and McDonald's were closing all their stores. I think the boss is pissed off with me because he just replied, take seven days off and come back if you don't have symptoms. Really feels like they don't care about us or their customers. 

I applied for a job at Tesco, but I’m slightly worried hearing about all those drivers getting robbed too. I don’t want to work in a store, because I know me, driving jobs are fine, but being in a super market all day is too much. I think I’m going to lay low for a few days, see if I get symptoms and keep an eye on the news. I don’t really know what else to do.